My Awkward Years #1


I’d like to share with you my awkward years.
Between the ages of being born and eleven, I was the girl that everyone looked over. I was nice, well mannered, and I didn’t do crazy stuff. Also, I was probably the only girl between my then friends that hadn’t kissed a boy. I used to go to a small elementary school, around 400 students more or less, so that meant limited cute boys. When I mean limited, I mean limited. In my sixth grade graduating class (where I lived we graduated in 6th grade) there were 3 cute guys, and every single girl knew it.
Thankfully I was “lucky” enough to snatch one of those guys (let’s call him Pablo) in third grade and that “love” went on until sixth grade, I kid you not. Don’t worry, my third grade love was nothing more than saying ‘hi’ to each other when we passed by and making googly eyes in class. Everyone knew we were “together”, but we really didn’t live up to the part… Then again, we were only third graders. Then, I don’t even remember how or IF we broke up, but we stopped liking each other.. or at least he did.  For a while I was fine.  He dated other girls, I liked other guys (like his cousin who was and still is wayyy hotter than him), he kissed other girls… Like a whole fucking lot. He went around all of my friends and then in sixth grade he came back to me.
I started liking Pablo again in the first semester of sixth grade, I think. He ignored it though. He kept me waiting, and dating other girls. AND THENNNNNNNNN, FINALLY, he came back to me almost at the end of the year. It was a few months before graduation when he asked me to be his girlfriend, which I said yes to by the way. That lasted for three days.
That time he wasn’t okay with smiling at each other when we walked by or making googly eyes. He wanted more. The thing is that I wasn’t into kissing or anything remotely sexual at the time. I was into hugs and smiling and being goofy and romantic. He so wasn’t. On the second day of our sixth grade relationship (if you can even call it that), he tried to hold my hand.
In that moment, I started getting shaky and my hands got clammy so I let go and walked away. I don’t know why I was so scared of hand holding, but I was. So that same day, I told my best friend (who also had a crush on him, let’s call her Jessie) that I was gonna break it off. She was sooooo mad at me. She even stopped talking to me for a whole day and using our other best friend (let’s call her Tori) as a messenger. I remember Jessie used to really like him. In fact, we used to send him love letters together. Literally. We took a piece of paper once and wrote:
“Dear Pablo,
We think that you are very cute and very nice. Do you think we’re cute?
Love,
Charlie and Jessie”
It was very weird how we thought it was okay to write a love letter and sign it together.
Anyway, when I told her I was gonna break it off, she got so pissed because she was sad that I was gonna hurt him. I remember telling her I was sorry, but that he had made me wait so long that my feelings for him had disappeared. Which was true.
On the third day, the day of the break up, I went to school feeling nervous and kinda mean for what I was about to do. Jessie wasn’t talking to me, poor Tori was walking around trying to get us to make up, and I was about to break up with who I thought back then would be the love of my life. SPOILER ALERT: He wasn’t.
First and second period went by super fast. When the third period arrived, which I had decided would be the break up period because we had a substitute teacher, I was nervous and jumpy.
I went up to Pablo and smiled like I wasn’t just about to break his heart, which I didn’t cause I was too scared. So like the coward I was, I went up to one of my “best friends” (this wasn’t Tori nor Jessie) and asked her if she’d break up with him for me. She agreed. I remember watching his face when she broke the news.  While I was expecting a breakdown, and I’ll admit some tears, he literally just shrugged it off and said okay. The asshole took it so well that the one that felt like crap was me.
That’s how Jessie realized that he was stupid for not being sad over our break up and we made up. I think she was sadder than he was.  Soon after, we saw him with another girl who had also been with his cousin. After a while we forgot about him and went on to like his cousin cause he was so hot and he had such a nice butt. He was also really really nice despite being a “bad boy”.
Fast forward eight years later (which is the present), Pablo messages me saying that I’ve changed and grown up (I think you all know what he meant by that). I greeted him normally and we talked for a while. Then night comes and he tries to sext me and I completely ignore it cause I’m in no way attracted to him.
The next day I go on whatsapp and look at his picture, right? It’s with a girl. I ask him if he has a girlfriend, and he said they’re on a break (ROSS AND RACHEL ANYONE?) and that they’re one of those on-again-off-again couples. When he realizes that I don’t get with guys with girlfriends he immediately starts apologizing and begging me to delete the conversation and pics that he sent me and not to tell anyone. I didn’t reply to those messages and left it in the air so he’d suffer.
Pablo, if you ever read this, don’t worry… I deleted everything. Also, you suuuuuuuck at sexting.
Conclusion of everything, Pablo grew up to be an asshole.
xoxo,
Charlie ♡

Charlie

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